Fear of “Learning” Disordered Behaviors from Other Patients in Eating Disorder Treatment
Understanding the Risks, Protecting Recovery, and Creating Safer Healing Spaces
One of the most common — and least talked about — fears in eating disorder treatment is the fear of absorbing or “learning” new disordered behaviors from other patients.
This concern isn’t just a worry expressed by parents or clinicians. Many individuals in recovery themselves carry this anxiety:
“What if being around other patients actually makes my eating disorder worse?”
“I didn’t even know that behavior existed — now I feel triggered to try it.”
“I compare myself constantly to others in treatment. It’s exhausting.”
These are valid and important reflections. And yet, talking about this openly can feel taboo — as though acknowledging this risk threatens the foundation of shared recovery spaces.
This blog post aims to bring clarity and compassion to this topic, helping patients, families, and providers navigate it with honesty and safety.
Why This Happens: The Nature of Eating Disorders and Comparison
Eating disorders often thrive on:
Comparison: to others’ bodies, behaviors, or progress
Perfectionism: the desire to do recovery “right” — or have the “worst” version of the illness
Cognitive rigidity: difficulty holding nuance or tolerating grey areas
Hyper-focus on rules and rituals: especially when others model them
In a treatment setting — where people are vulnerable, anxious, and immersed in recovery work — it’s understandable that observing others' behaviors or hearing about their experiences can activate the eating disorder voice.
You may notice:
Wanting to “catch up” or “compete” with someone perceived as sicker
Curiosity about new behaviors (“Should I try that?”)
Feeling invalidated if your symptoms differ or seem less extreme
Increased body surveillance or shame about progress
This isn’t a reflection of your character. It’s a common reaction when eating disorder wiring meets a communal space.
Risk Factors That Can Intensify This Fear
Early stages of recovery: When motivation is still fragile and identity is intertwined with the disorder
Limited insight: When someone has not yet externalized the eating disorder
High sensitivity to hierarchy or “sick enough” thinking
Previous exposure to pro-eating disorder content (online or offline)
Low distress tolerance: Making comparison a form of emotional escape
Lack of containment by staff in poorly moderated treatment settings
If you’ve ever felt like your treatment space triggered more behaviors than it healed, you’re not alone — and you’re not wrong to question it.
The Line Between Empathy and Contagion
Recovery spaces often promote connection, vulnerability, and shared understanding. But when boundaries are unclear, they can also become places where disorder-sharing masquerades as honesty.
This is especially true in group settings where:
Details of behaviors are shared without redirection
Comparisons about weight, food, or treatment phase go unchecked
There's subtle competition around who’s “struggling more”
What starts as empathy can cross into behavioral contagion, where:
The brain encodes new disordered ideas as potential tools
Exposure to new behaviors feels informative instead of neutral
Recovery is subconsciously postponed in favor of “getting worse first”
Creating Protection Within Yourself and Your Environment
1. Know Your Triggers and Boundaries
Take stock of what is destabilizing for you. Ask:
Are there specific behaviors, topics, or comments that spike my anxiety or ED thoughts?
Do I feel worse after certain groups or interactions?
What kind of vulnerability feels constructive — and what feels performative or harmful?
Set clear internal boundaries:
“If someone talks about calorie numbers, I’ll redirect my attention.”
“I don’t need to compare my story to anyone else's. Mine is valid as it is.”
2. Work With Your Team to Build Safe Containment
Talk to your therapist or dietitian about your concerns. They can:
Adjust your treatment plan
Offer tools to manage triggering content
Help you build internal scripts for redirecting yourself in groups
Ensure staff are moderating discussions with appropriate structure
If you’re in a program that tolerates frequent triggering content, advocating for psychological safety is part of protecting your recovery.
3. Focus on the Function, Not the Form
Rather than absorbing “new” behaviors, ask:
What function does that behavior serve for them?
Do I already have similar urges or coping strategies that serve that same purpose?
What are healthier ways I can meet those emotional needs?
Understanding the function helps you depersonalize and defuse the allure of new behaviors.
4. Practice Emotional Grounding After Group Interactions
If a group or peer conversation is triggering, use tools like:
Journaling what came up, and what you want to hold onto vs. let go
Mindfulness exercises or breathing techniques
Talking with a staff member or support person for processing
Taking a sensory break to reset your nervous system
What Providers and Treatment Teams Can Do
Set clear group guidelines (e.g., no mention of numbers, weights, or specific behaviors)
Redirect conversations that drift into comparison or excessive detail
Model curiosity without glorification when discussing symptoms
Monitor peer interactions and support those feeling overwhelmed
Address the “sick enough” myth and dismantle competitive thinking with compassion
A well-run program should promote recovery culture, not inadvertently reinforce disorder loyalty.
Final Thought
The fear of learning disordered tricks from others in treatment is real, valid, and survivable. You are not “too sensitive” for feeling this way. You are intuitive, aware, and protecting the part of you that wants to get well.
The goal of treatment is not to absorb more illness — it's to shed what no longer serves you. By building strong boundaries, speaking up, and staying grounded in your recovery path, you can keep moving forward — even in the presence of others walking their own uneven paths beside you.
If You’re Feeling Overwhelmed in Treatment Spaces
Talk to your therapist or a trusted team member
Ask for one-on-one time or a temporary group break
Journal about your needs and what safety looks like for you
Connect with a recovery mentor or peer who is grounded in healing
Remind yourself: you’re not here to win at being sick — you’re here to get your life back
And that life? It’s yours. Not anyone else’s to compare, copy, or compete with
